In My Dreams
by WizMonCruWil
Summary: "Taking the name of Ben's family was one thing. But taking his name... did she even have the right?... There had not been, nor would there ever be, a wedding ceremony. So, Force Bond or not, Dyad or not, soulmates or not, did Rey have the right to think of Ben and call him... husband?" Set immediately after TROS. How will Rey go on without Ben? Can their love still flourish?
1. Chapter 1: The First Night of the Rest o

**Chapter 1: The First Night of the Rest of Her Life**

Rey watched as the last rays of Tatooine's twin suns sank towards the horizon. Her expression was wistful, and for the first time since her true love had collapsed in her embrace, she allowed tears - tears shed by the thought of him - to flow freely. Bowing her head into her hand, she wept bitterly, the sobs strangled and loud.

Concerned beeping mixed into the chorus of hiccups, and Rey felt BB8 nudge her calf. She waved him off. She needed this moment, and to grieve for as long as she needed to...

...which would probably be forever. And in yet another desolate desert world. Perhaps that was punishment enough for her. She may have come here initially for the express purpose of burying the lightsabers of the Skywalker twins, and Luke may have told her on Ahch-To to not run away and hide as he did... but right now, that was all Rey wanted and needed to do. Rebuilding the Jedi in her image would come in due time. She already had her first recruit. She had been speechless when Finn had told her he was Force sensitive... and then had internally winced when the implications sank in. She knew best friends shouldn't hide things from each other, keep secrets, and yet that would be harder to do with Finn from now on. He could sense her feelings, and had - maybe not as strong as Ben had, but still. More than once, the ex-Stormtrooper had asked her if she was all right, why her tears refused to abate. Rey had merely said that her weeping was of relief, that she and Finn and Poe were alive. And that had been the truth... partially.

Whether the rest of the truth would ever come out, Rey was uncertain. Poe and Finn had never known about her Force Bond with Ben. Their star-crossed Force Dyad. Maybe they never would need to. Rey could only feel so much from other people and still have her own feelings left for herself.

No question: she needed to mourn. Reflect.

The Tatooine horizon was a deep, dark purple now, the first stars appearing. She tapped BB8's spherical head. "Come on, little one." And Jedi and droid turned back to their new home.

Rey could feel the presence of the Skywalkers, her adoptive family, here. Renouncing the family of her birth - Palpatine - in favor of them had been the first and surprisingly easiest step on the long, hard road to closure. Coming to Tatooine, fairly simple also. Whether she would stay... Rey was leaning heavily towards the affirmative. Perhaps that was due to her lingering urge to stay near desert lands - nothing less than violence had compelled her to flee Jakku after 13 years. And in the desert, she was comfortable. Despite loving what else the galaxy had had to offer once she had ventured beyond her front door, it was what the galaxy had taken away that behooved her to go back to what she knew. It seemed no less than what she deserved. Maybe that was indulging in self-pity, but Rey craved some self-pity right about then.

She had failed. In her greatest mission, greater even than defeating the Emperor and saving the galaxy, she had failed to save the life of the man she loved. The first and only man she had ever kissed. Her soulmate in the Force. She had redeemed him, but the future she had seen when they had touched hands on Ahch-To a year ago would never come to pass. Not now.

The metal toboggan slid to a stop at the bottom of the open-air courtyard. The faint echo of a Jedi from decades past pulsed throughout the place - Anakin Skywalker, Ben's grandfather and now her adoptive grandfather. He certainly was a step up from her biological one, a level step at worst when taking into account Anakin's alter ego as Darth Vader. Stronger still was the presence of Ben's uncle, Luke Skywalker, as she stepped through the hydraulic door that led into what had clearly once been a kitchen. Rey illuminated her golden lightsaber as true night finally took hold. There was charring on the hardened sand walls... had there been a fire here? Perhaps. Touching one blackened mark, Rey almost immediately jerked her hand back, as a truly gruesome memory of the past attacked her through the Force. Poor, poor Luke... Still, she felt closer to him, knowing this was the boyhood home of her adoptive uncle.

And maybe she was just imagining it, or clinging to silly girlish hope, but she felt just the tiniest flicker of her...

She daren't finish the thought, but Rey burst into tears all over again just the same. Why dwell on a dearest wish denied? But she didn't want to let it go. Taking the name of Ben's family was one thing. But taking _his_ name... did she even have the right?

Ben had been her soulmate in the Force. Her other and better half in their Dyad. Not long after flying back from Exogol in Luke's X-wing, Rey had needed to borrow a holo dictionary from Poe to look up what those words meant. Deep in her heart, she had known what words like _soulmate_ and _Dyad_ meant to her. And indeed, the definition of the latter - a pair of individuals (such as a husband and a wife) maintaining a sociologically significant relationship - had made her heart palpitate ectopically. Had threatened the tears to fall anew.

She had no doubt that she and Ben would have married had he lived. And if we would have had her. Ben's kiss, the way he had held her tightly, left no doubt in Rey's mind that he would have agreed to a proposal.

Except there had not been, nor would there ever be, a wedding ceremony. So, Force Bond or not, Dyad or not, soulmates or not, did Rey have the right to think of Ben and call him... _husband_?

Perhaps in the creation of their Bond, the Force had married them. Proclaimed them man and wife before their hearts could even reach that acceptance. But could a confession of love too late (Rey's heart cleaved in two that she had never said those three little words to him), could a broken heart professing sole fidelity to a man just dead... could those alone declare Rey wed? Could she take a married name by fiat as easily as she had taken an adopted one?

Huh. Maybe when that woman had asked her for her name outside the homestead, she should have answered, "Rey Solo."

Solo... the surname an eternal reminder that Rey was once more, well and truly, all alone. Rey took a deep breath.

"Start with what you know is true," she whispered to herself. "I am Rey Skywalker. I was born Rey Palpatine, but am now Rey Skywalker. Their ancestors are my ancestors..." At that moment, for the first time since Exogol, a wave of peace washed over her, as she concluded, "And Ben Solo is my husband. I am the wife of Ben Solo. The Force itself willed it."

She felt the energy field's approval. And with it, there it was again: the tiniest brush from her... husband in the Force. Rey could almost see Ben's smile. Hear his laugh.

She whimpered, another tear slid down her cheek, as she opened another door, this one leading into a bedroom. She felt BB8 roll after her, as she circled the bed. It appeared built for two, and it made her wonder if she and Ben would have shared a bed, maybe even this bed, if they had settled here - likely in secret, of course. Surely they would have. How... romantic...

Breaking down into sobs anew, Rey let her body strewn itself across the dusty mattress and buried her face into the pillow to weep. BB8 chittered forlornly, but she could not be comforted. Newly widowed before her honeymoon could have even begun, Rey cried herself to sleep over her lost love.


	2. Chapter 2: Into My Dreams and Into His A

**Chapter 2: Into My Dreams and Into His Arms**

Rey did not remember giving in to slumber. In the minutes and hours after the death of her beloved, when she had allowed herself to think about sleep, she had presumed that she was now doomed to suffer from aching insomnia as well as endless grief. Though she and Ben had never slept together - platonically or otherwise, had never appeared to each other in their Bond while in bed, Rey had always felt Ben's presence in the Force humming. Quite often, it had been the last thing she felt before she closed her eyes. Now, she felt a gaping hole in her heart, a pain where he should have been. Nevertheless, sleep enveloped her in a lover's embrace and carried her away as grandly as Ben had carried her off to his shuttle on Takodana, the first time they met.

The first thing Rey noticed after she drifted off to sleep was that she was on a terrace of blinding white marble. The balcony beyond overlooked a vast lake, dapple sunlight brushing the blue waters so that the waves sparkled.

And against the balcony railing stood a statuesque man, his back to her, hands clasped behind him. Flowing black hair tumbled down to his shoulders.

Then the man turned around and Rey promptly lost her breath.

His face was still so beautifully chiseled, his hazel eyes as deep and entrancing as ever. And most bewitching of all was his glorious smile. The same smile that he had given her after he had kissed her lips and held her so tightly.

Heart alighting, Rey gave him the most beaming smile in return as she ran into his arms. He caught her in midair and they spun, Rey's arms looped about his neck. When he finally set her down, she breathed in relief.

"Ben..." Tenderly, she stroked her fingers along his edged jaw. "Is this a dream?"

That special smile reserved just for her dipped only the tiniest bit. "It is."

Rey simply gazed at him, radiant. "Then, I don't ever, _ever_ want to wake up."

This time, it was he who closed the gap between them, their lips meeting in a searing kiss. Rey let her digits sink into his black locks that she had always wanted to run her hands through and she purred in contentment. At long last, they broke the kiss dreamily, and only then did Rey allow herself to come apart. She clung to him, her sobs anguished, punctuated and bitter. Ben simply rocked her, stroking her hair.

"Ssssh... darling, it's all right... don't cry."

Rey's latest sob turned into a moan and she nuzzled her face against his chest. "Just... just hold me," she whimpered, pleaded. "Hold me like you did on Exogol, when there was nothing but our love. No Emperor, no Jedi..." She felt his chin come to rest on top of her head. "No war," she whispered and his grip tightened. She let out a deep, shuddering breath and her whole body relaxed. There it was. He'd held her just like that, just that tightly when she had kissed him on Exogol. "Hold me, Ben."

"Forever," he sighed. Rey peered up into his face, and exulted at the gorgeous smile he sent her. Tearfully, she gave a weak smile back. Ben swept her off her feet and into his arms, kissing her again. "Rey," he moaned happily, sounding like a man withering away from thirst. He gallantly carried her over to a stone bench and took a seat, keeping her in his lap. Rey dropped her head on his shoulder happily. For a moment, both were content in the silence of being together. Then Ben chuckled. Rey shivered with delight, and had he not been holding her, she would have gone collapsing to the ground.

"So... Dyad, huh? Soulmates? Does that mean according to the Force, we're married?"

Rey turned to Ben with a twinkle in her air and amused smile. "I kind of thought we already were." A pause and then she asked hesitantly, "Do you want to be?"

He boyishly nodded. "Do...?"

She beamed. "I do." Ben softly kissed her, and Rey threw her arms about him with a moan.

"I've missed you," Ben sighed.

"Ohh..." Rey groaned, holding him tighter. "It took me so long to find you. Where are you?"

"Someplace where my soul must be cleansed."

She stared at him with love, caressing his cheek. "Your soul? Cleansed? But you already redeemed yourself."

He drank her in sadly. "The Force must still pass its judgment on me."

"Well, then, take me away to wherever you are!"

"No, my love." He touched her face. "Thank the Maker you came back to me!"

Rey brushed her cheek against his with a pining moan. "I love you! I never told you..." she cried. She grabbed his face. "I. Love. You. Ben. Solo," punctuating each word with a kiss.

For a time, Rey and Ben kissed and kissed and kissed. At last, Ben willed himself to drift away. "It's almost time for you to wake up, my precious."

Rey moaned and clung to him. "Will I ever see you again?" she asked. Ben smirked adoringly at her. "What does your heart tell you?"

"Yes... maybe."

"Then we _will_ see each other again. I believe that."

Ben's beautiful Jedi kissed him goodbye. "I love you, my husband," Rey whispered against his lips, her voice tearful and hoarse. "I love you more than I've ever loved anyone." "

"I love you too my beautiful wife. I'll be here when next you fall asleep."

Rey awoke in her bed on Tatooine with tears on her pillow, but a hopeful smile on her face.

* * *

From then on, Rey always looked forward to the nighttime the most.

Her sleeping moments were quickly becoming more preferable than her waking moments. Ben was always the first thing she thought of when she woke up in the morning, and the last thing she thought of when she went to bed. And in between, when she wasn't exploring the outposts beyond the Lars homestead, gathering supplies, Rey was bent over the toilet.

At first, she thought it was her grief over Ben manifesting itself in a physical way. But Rey soon came to realize that it was more than that. Especially after one bout of vomiting, when Rey felt something move _inside_ of her. Eyes widening, her palm instinctively caressed her abdomen.

Just then, a memory came rushing back. Her consciousness slowly regaining on Exogol... she had felt Ben's hand on her belly, when she clasped his hand... The Force had brought her back to life. Was it possible...?

BB8 let out a curious, low beep. Turning to him, Rey burst into happy tears.

That night, Rey found herself wrapped in Ben's arms, seated on a picnic blanket amidst tall grasses in high lake country. The lovers kissed and kissed as though they could never stop. Finally, Ben drew back to caress her face. His pleased smirk made Rey's heart sing.

"You're wearing my undershirt."

Rey blushed shyly as she played with the tiny hole in it. She had kept all the clothes Ben left behind when his body faded away. "I wear it every night now. It's warm. It still has your scent. It's comforting... even the cowl."

Ben threw back his head and laughed. "Oh, is it now?"

Rey giggled. Cupping his face in her hands, she kissed him soundly. She drummed her fingers lightly along his jaw. "You saved me," she murmured low. "But you also gave me a wonderful gift... I'm pregnant."

From the stunned look on his face, Rey realized that Ben had had no knowledge of what he had done. She peered at him searchingly, until at last, he spoke.

"I did everything that I had to do to save your life. But I didn't intend to create new life..."

Rey placed a finger on Ben's lips. "Ssssh... Ben, it's all right." She recalled the lesson she had learned on Ahch-To: death and decay, that feeds new life...

"No, it isn't. You're scarcely twenty, and to be a mother, and on a desert rock like Tatooine..." He brushed her forehead. "If you want to get an abortion... I'll understand."

Beaming, Rey just shook her head. "No. Ben..." and lacing her fingers through his, she placed them over her belly, "I want to bear your child. This is my one chance... our one chance." She blushed shyly. "I hope I'm worthy."

Ben tilted her head up. "You're the only one who is worthy."

Rey smiled and they embraced in a tender kiss. The kiss quickly grew out of control, and soon Rey was being bent back over the soft picnic blanket. Ben's hands lightly brushed her breasts; reminded of him tearing the golden necklace from her neck on Pasaana, Rey let out a strangled hiss. Wordlessly, she spread her legs and Ben settled in between them. He seductively peeled his clothes away from her body. Beads of sweat began to gather on Rey's brow. Her hands fisted to bunch up the fabric of the blanket. Her back arched as Ben's fingers glided up her quivering thighs. Eyes wide, Rey pulled her husband inside of her. The sounds she began to make were loud and low and long.

"Uhhh... Huhhhhhh... Ohhhhh... Please... Oh, Ben, please... Ben!" She came all around him with a happy sigh, her orgasm awakening her from her dream.

Sighing heavily, Rey peeled the damp sleepwear of herself to soak in the bathtub and returned to bed. But sleep refused to mercifully claim her once more.


	3. Chapter 3: Telling the Family

**Chapter 3: Telling the Family **

Rey searched far and wide for a doctor on Tatooine who might help her through her pregnancy. She scoured Mos Eisley, Ancorhead, and Tosche Station. But of the few doctors there were on the desert rock, none of them knew how to treat an expecting Jedi carrying a likely Force-sensitive baby. Sometimes, the right medicine wasn't even available.

But there was one doctor who still might be able to help Rey prepare for her baby: Dr. Kalonia. And that meant going back to Ajan Kloss.

After the Battle of Exogol, most of the surviving Resistance had settled on the jungle world. Contacting Kalonia, Rey told her she needed to come in for a check-up. The Jedi knew that word would get back to her friends and by the time her X-wing was in the air, a hologram had patched through from a jubilant Finn and Poe.

When Rey arrived on Ajan Kloss, it was deep night. She touched down in front of a spacious domed hut and compound, from which two men were sprinting to meet her. Scaling the ladder, Rey ran into the arms of the darker-skinned man, her smile able to light up both Tatooine's suns.

"Finn! Oh, Finn!" Her voice came out in a happy squeal.

Finn clutched her close as Poe ambled up, ruffling her hair. "I have the spare room set up. It's all arranged. It'll be nice to have someone other than Finn crashing it."

"Hmm," Rey mused dryly, looping her arm through his. "I'll expect a mess, then."

"Oh, kriff! I forgot to take care of the vaporators..." Poe started to double back.

"Oh, you go ahead, Poe. I'll power down the vaporators," Rey offered. Then, as soon as the Generals were out of earshot, she added softly, while cradling her baby bump, "And figure out a way to tell them about _you_..." She almost moaned in fear, taking her time in powering down the vaporators before following the boys into the house. Entering the foyer, she stopped: it was completely spotless. Rey smirked, amused. "Wow. You guys got a maid or something?"

Poe chuckled almost nervously, scratching the back of his neck. "No. Not exactly..."

"Then..." A sudden crash from the next room made the trio jump.

"POE! Damn it, you nerf-herder! Where did you put my lingerie?"

Poe winced. "In the laundry hamper, dear."

Zorri Bliss suddenly emerged, her hair in ringlets and looking beautiful. "I can handle my own drawers, you... sexy... Peeping Tom!"

Poe frowned at how unusually flustered Zorri appeared. "I thought you'd appreciate me cleaning up a bit!"

Zorri huffed, hands on her hips. "Why did I even marry you?"

"We were drunk and had just had really good sex," Poe deadpanned.

Rey gasped, whirling to him. "You got married?!" she squeaked. "Without telling me?!"

"It was very sudden," Poe justified. "And quiet. This idiot was the only one there!" Finn scowled, but it looked forced.

"I still say you guys should have waited until Lando, Jannah and Rose returned, never mind Rey!"

"If we had, then I may never have gotten Zorri down the aisle!" Poe slung an arm over his wife's shoulder and dove in for a kiss; Zorri surprisingly allowed it.

"RAWWR!" Everyone glanced back to see Chewie arriving in the doorway. Poe grinned. "How about a round of Sabaac?"

The friends gathered around the kitchen table as Chewie circulated the cards, Poe stepping over to the bar to pour drinks. "I've got Coreillian wine, Coruscanti whiskey, Mustafar Merlot..."

Hearing the options, Rey's stomach roiled. "Oh, no thanks, Poe. Just water for me." She smiled as Chewie dealt in her hand.

Poe frowned in bemusement. "Just _water_?" He shrugged and reached for the ice pitcher. "Well, you are a desert girl..."

"So, Rey: you're finally here to start my Jedi training, right? You said when you returned, we would start my training!" Finn was nearly bouncing in his seat.

Rey grinned tightly. "Well, actually, I have an appointment with Dr. Kalonia..."

"What the kriff for? All your injuries healed from Exogol."

"It's not that, Finn. And anyway, we'll have to delay your training."

Finn looked dejected. "Delay? For how long?"

Rey winced and spat it out. "About 9 months." Around the table, she saw only Zorri raise an eyebrow. The bounty hunter pieced it together instantly.

"9 months?!" Finn yelped. "Why would you need to..." His voice suddenly, abruptly trailed off. Rey just gazed at him apologetically. She took a deep, shaky breath.

"There's a part about me you don't know... The part I once swore not to tell you..."

"Rey, if this is about you being the granddaughter of the Emperor, we don't care!" Poe insisted. But he was eyeing her curiously.

"It's not that." Rey's eyes never left her best friend's, as she took his hand and rubbed her thumb over his knuckles. "Finny..." she crooned. "I'm pregnant."

A heavy silence fell over the kitchen. Finn seemed to have lost the ability to speak. Finally, his eyes flashed. "All right, little desert flower, who do I have to kill?"

Rey trilled out a laugh, her expression affectionately bemused. "Kill?"

"Yes, kill! I'm gonna bloody kill whoever did this to you!" The protective anger was rolling off him in waves and for the first time since she had lost her precious Ben, Rey was glad he wasn't here so Finn could try and murder him.

"That won't be necessary," Rey stammered. Her gaze snapped to Zorri for a moment.

"Did someone get fresh with you at the bars?" Finn was asking. "I've heard those traders at Mos Eisley can be some shady characters." Poe nodded in grim agreement.

"No," Rey got out quickly. "It was consensual... sort of."

Poe's one eyebrow cocked dangerously. "_Sort_ of? But who's the father?"

Rey glanced to him before getting out in a whisper, "Ben Solo."

Poe's eyes nearly popped. "What?! Ben Solo?!"

Rey smiled weakly, strained. "I suppose I should start from the beginning..."

* * *

"Kylo Ren captured me on Takodana," Rey started, the Sabaac card game long forgotten. "He took me aboard his flagship and interrogated me about BB8. When I resisted, I used the Force for the first time, and... Kylo and I built a connection. After I left for Ahch-To, Kylo and I discovered that we had a Force Bond. We could see and talk to each other from lightyears away. The more time we spent together, the more I saw Ben - the real Ben."

"And what happened?" Finn demanded.

Rey's smile was heartsick. "I fell in love."

Finn nearly choked. "You fell in love... with... him? Of all the people..."

"And I loved him enough that I thought I could save him, so I went to him aboard the _Supremacy_, to try and turn Ben back to the light. His master, Snoke, tortured me, but Ben saved me from him. But when I asked him to come away with me..." Rey's eyes glistened with tears at the memory. "He couldn't do it. We got separated, but the Bond remained. We continued to see each other."

"And you kept this from us? For a whole _year_?" Finn's voice rose several decibels.

Across the table, Poe turned to Zorri. "Am I blacking out?" he asked his wife, his tone oddly mild, but his expression bewildered and pained.

Rey nodded regretfully.

"But all those times he chased us... especially in those final hours..." Poe spluttered.

"He wanted me to be safe with him. From Palpatine. But after our duel at the Death Star ruins on Kef Bir, when I went to Exogol... Ben arrived to save me. He redeemed himself and risked his life to save me. And then... when I died... Ben used the Force to bring me back to life." At this, Rey's expression became lovesick, dreamy. "We kissed... I've never felt such love before, and... and..." She broke down in tears. "He died!"

For a while, all that could be heard was Rey's sniffles. At last, she croaked out, "But when Ben placed his hands on my stomach... I remember holding his hand when I woke up... he did more than revive me. He inadvertently created new life - his baby - inside me."

"So he knocked you up with the Force? He Force raped you?" Finn looked sick.

"It was not like that!" Rey insisted. "The Force and I consented to him! And Ben didn't realize what he had done!"

"Consent or not...Rey, how did you even have the time to become pregnant out of wedlock?" Finn got out.

"I didn't become pregnant out of wedlock. I'm married."

At Rey's declaration, Poe and Finn gaped at her. The Jedi explained. "Ben and I were two halves of a Force Dyad - a rare phenomenon. We are soulmates. Married in the Force."

"How can you be married?" Poe choked. "Was there a chapel? A minister? Wedding vows?"

"The interrogation room on Starkiller Base was our chapel. The Force was our minister. And we gave our wedding vows when we laid down our lives for each other on Exogol!" Rey proclaimed.

Beside her, Finn was steaming. "And I suppose Kylo - oh, I'm sorry, I mean, _darling Ben_ \- was simply carrying his bride across the threshold when he literally abducted you on Takodana!"

Rey angrily leapt to her feet. "My husband was a good man!"

"_Your husband_ was a monster!"

Rey stood deathly still. "I should challenge you to a lightsaber duel for that."

"One that I would win."

Rey barked out a mirthless laugh. "Without a Jedi's weapon or any training in the Force? Think again!" A strained pause, and then Rey cried, "I thought you guys were my friends, my family - that you would understand and accept my choice." She turned to Poe demandingly. "If Ben had lived, what would you have done? If Ben had asked me to marry him and I said Yes - and I _would_ have said Yes - what would you have done?"

"I would have refused to give you my blessing! I would have forbidden the marriage."

Rey's face churned with disdain. "Who are you, my father?"

"Clearly not, but I am still your commanding officer! Do you really think I would have allowed my dear friend to wed a war criminal? No!"

Rey glared. "We would have eloped," she declared defiantly.

"Oh, no you wouldn't have, because your fiancé would have almost certainly been seated on death row! And tell me this: if you are married to Ben, then why did you take the last name Skywalker? Why didn't you take the last name Solo? How can you both adopt and marry into the same family?"

Finn buried his head in his hand, rubbing his temple insistently. "Kriff, my head hurts."

"Should my married name serve as a constant reminder that I am a widow? That I am all alone?" Rey wailed.

"But you're _not_ alone!" Poe thundered. "The darkness wins when it makes you think you're alone! But you're not! We're your family!"

"_Family_?" Finn sneered. "Oh, no - I am _not_ helping raise Kylo Ren's bastard brat!"

Rey shook with anger, her teeth bared. She lunged at Finn. "You son of a bitch!-"

The pair struggled before Poe got between them. "Stop it... _stop it_!" The pilot pulled the pair apart, holding up a hand as Rey ignited her golden lightsaber and Finn tumbled backwards onto the floor, the former trooper reaching for his blaster. "Now you just put that down, Jedi."

"He insulted the love of my life! Our baby!"

Poe quickly lost patience. "What do you expect us to do, Rey? What do you want from us?" His voice rose an octave and several decibels as Rey stormed for the door. "Don't turn your back on us, _Rey Palpatine_ \- tell me what you want!"

Rey whirled around, blinking back tears. "My husband!" And she fled with a strangled sob.

* * *

"Rey? REY!"

The moon was high in the sky as Finn wandered amidst the jungle trees. He had taken it upon himself to track her down when she didn't return after a time. Her X-wing was still parked outside the Damerons' dwelling, but that had been small comfort.

At last, coming upon the edge of a cliff, he saw Rey hovering cross-legged in mid-air. She was meditating, a group of boulders levitating around her. By the light of the moon, Finn could see her mouth moving as she whispered, "Be with me... be with me... be with me..."

Finn cleared his throat. "If you come on down, I'd like to be with... er, talk with you."

She stiffened at this, her face in a tight frown, but eventually she floated herself and the boulders back to the jungle floor. Finn smiled trepidatiously.

"There, that wasn't so bad, was it?"

Rey didn't answer, but did not run as Finn drifted over to sit beside her, the pair glancing out over the cliff. Finally, Finn cleared his throat and managed to ram the words out.

"I'm sorry." Rey glanced to him expectantly, her eyes still hard. He tried to take the apology further. "I didn't know you and Ben had such a strong bond. And I guess... I couldn't really think of Kylo Ren and Ben Solo as two separate people."

Rey was still eyeing him warily, but her orbs softened as she nodded, accepting his answer. An awkward pause and then, Finn asked, "Did you love him? Ben, I mean?"

Rey now looked broken, helpless. But her voice was sure as she confessed, "I loved him, Finn. I love him still. By the Force itself, in my heart, I am married."

"_Was_ married. Until death did you part." To his credit, Finn sounded sad for her.

She smiled at him softly. "No. Ben will always be with me. There will never be anyone else like him. I could never love another man the way I love him."

Finn's expression was unreadable in that moment. "I believe you."

"Oh, _don't you_?" Rey's expression hardened unexpectedly and she cocked an eyebrow. She wouldn't forgive him that easily.

Finn gazed at her, pained. "Rey... I do. Please forgive me. I'll do anything! I'll help care for the baby - I don't give a damn who its father is!"

Rey took pity on him. Pecked his cheek. "Maker, I can never stay mad at you." Finn smiled in heavy relief.

The best friends walked back to the Dameron compound in silence. Poe was waiting for them, backlit by the warm lights inside. When he hesistantly raised his arms, Rey did not hesitate to walk into them.

"I'm sorry," the pilot murmured into her hair. "Forgive me?"

Rey nodded wearily. "Always." Lacing her fingers trough his, she guided them to her swelling stomach. But staring up into his face, her expression and voice brokered no argument. "My daughter will never be loved any less because of who her father was, or what he did."

Poe nodded vigorously. "Of course, Rey."

Rey smiled gently, her eyes swimming with tears. "I need you to help me, because this little girl has Skywalker and Palpatine blood in her veins. She is the descendant of two of the most notorious Sith Lords of all time."

Poe smirked, his expression teasing and brotherly. "_She_? So it's a girl?"

Rey couldn't help it. She beamed. "It's a girl." Her whisper was breathless.

Poe heaved out a sigh. "Well, my parents never gave me siblings. It will be nice to have a niece. You and the kid have a home here as long as you need one."

The tears streamed down Rey's cheeks as she hugged him around the neck. "Thank you!" she sobbed.

Finn smiled happily at the sight. "Thank goodness you're staying! A desert is no place for a mother and baby."

The trio burst out laughing.

"POE!" Zorri bellowed. "Damn it, honey, get in here so I can deal you in! Chewie's cheating again!"

Poe chuckled. "We'd better get in there before the Wookie washes her out."

"Threepio says to let the Wookie win," Finn suggested.

"Not when it means my wife will divorce me if I don't rescue her," Poe groaned. And the group headed inside.


	4. Chapter 4: Cravings

**Chapter 4: Cravings**

The card game ended late, with only Chewie and the Damerons still in the pot; Finn helped Rey to bed by the time the first few hands were over. Poe won, and managed to bail his wife out in the bargain, though it had been a near thing. Zorri may have been an accomplished bounty hunter, but she was a piss-poor Sabaac player, Chewie's blatant and unscrupulous cheating notwithstanding. One thing was clear: Poe wasn't letting her anywhere near the dejarik table aboard the _Falcon_.

Now the General lay awake in bed in the middle of the night, his wife snoring beside him. He himself had only gotten a few hours of peace and slumber before the reality of their evolving living situation shook him back awake. Both of his best friends were now living under his roof. With war's end, Finn had found himself untethered for the first time in his life and without a place to stay. In his life as a stormtrooper, and even with the Resistance, lodging had always been provided to him automatically. It had not been hard at all for Poe and Zorri - by that time newly married - to open their home to him. And now Rey was here, pregnant, if not quite barefoot to complete the picture. In any case, she too was adrift. What's more, Rey could put on a brave face all she liked - Poe had seen it more than once, in the just over a year they had known each other since the Battle of Crait. But the facts were still these: Rey was pregnant, without her husband... and absolutely terrified. No matter what had happened on Exogol or even before, Ben Solo had clearly done a number on her. When Rey had spoken of him at the dinner table, her expression had sometimes turned to what could only be described as besotted. Yes, the Jedi was still in love, clearly... and all the more miserable without him.

Which is what made Poe resolute in his vow that he would take care of his family - all of them, especially Zorri.

"Poe?" He turned his head as Zorri rolled over to face him, her svelte form backlit by the graying light poking its way through the curtains. "Honey? You awake?"

"Hmm," Poe grunted. He lightly stroked her arm. "Just thinking. Counting my blessings, I guess." Finding her hand in the dark, he squeezed it. "I'm grateful you're here. Poor Rey can't say the same, alone in a half-empty bed."

He thought he saw Zorri blush. "You're worried about her." It was an emphatic statement. Was she actually jealous? She shouldn't be, and Poe couldn't tell from her tone.

"Aren't you?" Poe twisted around to check the chrono on the nightstand. "She's pregnant and alone, without the person she loves..."

"She's strong. She can pull through," Zorri dismissed.

"Everyone needs help sometimes, sweetheart," Poe pointed out. "And although she would never admit it, Rey does. Ben's death really cut her up."

"Oh, so it's Ben now?" Zorri sat up against the comforter, turned on the lamp next to her. Poe tried not to salivate at her curves accentuated against her nightgown. "You actually believe that wild immaculate conception with the Force story?"

Poe was now starting to get annoyed at his wife's tone. "I have no reason to doubt her word. Rey never lies."

"But she's kept secrets from you," Zorri reminded him. "The Force Dyad or whatever hook-up shit that was."

"She had her reasons," Poe threw back the coverlet. "Would you want me waxing loquacious on our sex life?"

Zorri glowered. "I should hope not."

Poe suddenly grabbed her and kissed her wildly on the mouth. He nearly smirked when he pulled away; Zorri looked speechless. "That's what I thought." Another kiss, softer this time - he was encouraged when Zorri held it in acceptance. "I'm getting breakfast. You want something?"

She laughed and pushed him away. "I think you just satiated my appetite." She smirked at his smug smile. "Don't let it rush to your head. Go, you stubborn ass! I'll be out soon."

Grinning, Poe slid into his slippers and padded out to the kitchen. The artificial light made him squint as he opened the door to the refrigerator. Most mornings, he liked to fix his favorite breakfast of a grilled bantha cheese sandwich. Licking his lips, he scanned the shelves: no cheese in sight.

"Uh... Zorri, honey? Where'd ya stash the cheese?", belatedly remembering to modulate his voice in case the others were still sleeping. A quick glance into the sitting room told him the sleep couch (Finn's domain) was rumpled but empty.

"Top shelf." From the master bedroom, Zorri sounded somewhere between annoyed and bored.

Poe checked again. "Top shelf's empty!"

Just then, Rey wandered into the kitchen, her chestnut brown hair in curlers and wearing a flimsy nightgown. She stifled a yawn. "Morning."

"Morning, kid," Poe grunted, rummaging through the fridge. "Sleep well?"

Her smile could have lit both of Tatooine's suns. "Heavenly. Ben visits me in my dreams..."

Hearing how dreamy and sappy her voice got, Poe tuned her out. "That's nice." Pulling his head out of the fridge, he glanced to her... then did a double take at what was in her other hand. "You're... you... you're eating all the bantha cheese!"

Rey's impish smile grew, her doe brown eyes innocent. "Yeah. It's some kriffing good cheese too!" She craned her neck around to poke her nose into the fridge. "You got any more?"

Poe threw up his hands. "And so the cravings begin..." he muttered, loudly.

Just then, steam wafted into the kitchen as Finn emerged from the fresher, a towel wrapped around his waist. The ex-Stormtrooper grinned through yanking a shirt over his torso.

"Well, man, hop to it then! If you can be a runner of spice, you sure as shit can be a runner of cheese!"

Poe glowered at him, but begrudgingly pulled on his boots, before stomping out into the flora. The base's General store was depleted enough as it was; Beaumont was going to kill him...

* * *

Rey found herself taking her turn under the fresher a few minutes later. Her hands wandered to grip the taut skin hugging her rounding belly; she was beginning to show nicely.

It had been a lovely dream, last night. She and Ben had cuddled in the cozy cockpit of her X-wing, kissing and cuddling and just being together. Their night alone had culminated in Ben taking Rey in the pilot's seat. She came so hard she saw stars, and when she awoke, she was sopping wet.

Even though she was in a dream, it felt very real to Rey. She believed, in a sense, that it in fact was real - an evolution, an adaptation of their Bond.

Dream or reality, Ben could keep her satisfied when she was asleep. But when she was awake... Rey's pregnancy was consuming her with sexual urges - urges that could not be satisfied until she went to bed at night.

In reading up on pregnancy from the base library or books she borrowed from Poe, Rey had not come to an answer of whether her lust could only be attributed to her baby's father, or if her urges compelled her to fuck anything that moved. In any case, she might not have Ben readily available when awake, but there were two other, very handsome men living with her under the same roof.

She shook her head, both to clear water from her hair and the lustful thoughts from her head. She couldn't very well have sex with Poe, and give Zorri yet another reason to hate her. And as for Finn... the thought of going hog wild with her best friend made her squirm in discomfort, even if the image of his half-naked form made a blush tinge her cheeks. Besides, even if he was gone, passed on, Rey knew she could never betray Ben like that.

Kriffing hell! Throwing her towel over the shower rack and blinking back tears, Rey donned a robe and stomped out of the bathroom. The fact that the bathrobe could no longer reliably hide her growing figure only soured her mood further. The expecting Jedi stormed into the kitchen, looking like she wanted to shout and burst into tears all at once.

"I hate this!" she yelled without preamble, causing Finn to jump and starling Poe so much that he nearly let the pancakes burn. "I'm tired all the time, I have aches in my feet... and I'm as big as a house!"

"Yes - a _gorgeous_ house," Poe tried to comfort her, circling around with her plate. He ignored Zorri's harrumph of disapproval over by the kitchen island.

Rey didn't answer, but turned slightly pink, even as she mumbled, "Don't let Zorri hear you say that."

"Maybe I will... if only to give her a hint." Poe leveled his wife with a pointed, yet pleading look. The bounty hunter just scowled and shook her head. Rey observed the exchange curiously for a moment before turning back to her eggs. "I'm also horny as fuck." She announced this almost casually, and Finn nearly choked on his bantha milk.

"Horny? As in... you really need to have sex?"

Rey glared. "Maybe I do need some fucking. Why? You offering?" Now it was Poe's turn to nearly asphyxiate on his breakfast.

Finn turned as red as possible, even with his dark skin, and averted his gaze. "Nope," he squeaked.

Rey snorted and stabbed a link of sausage with her fork. "That's what I thought."


	5. Chapter 5: Nesting

**Chapter 5: Nesting **

The thunder clouds crashed with ferocious anger outside the Dameron compound. On that dark and stormy night, Rey found herself curled up beside the roaring fireplace. She was currently in her nightgown and caressing her baby bump, a book cracked open on her swelling stomach as she attempted to sit cross-legged on the sleep couch. Down the hall, she could hear the shower spray going, while she waited for Finn to emerge from his nightly bath and gently kick her off his bed for the night.

The front door suddenly opened, and the raging squall practically blew Poe in across the threshold, carrying a damp bundle of firewood.

"Hope this lights," he cracked a strained grin as he crossed to the hearth and readied a stick of flint. "Monsoon season is really bad this cycle."

Rey just smiled gently, absently, rubbing a hand over her belly. "Hmmm... I think that would be lovely for a girl's name..."

"Huh?" Poe straightened. "What would be good for a girl's name?"

Rey jerked out of her thoughts and smiled in weak embarrassment, realizing that she had been talking to herself. "Oh, nothing. It's a surprise. Trying out names for the baby..." Her brow furrowed as another line of thought came over her. "Say, did Leia ever tell you anything about her mother?"

Poe shrugged. "Only that she was the Queen of Naboo. Her name was... Padme Amidala, I think. People say she was fierce, kind and beautiful, but she lived a tragic life."

Rey beamed in sympathy as she thought of Ben's grandmother. "How... appropriate," she mused, glancing to her bump with a smile.

Finn emerged from the fresher just then, causing Poe to wince. "Oh, get a shirt on before you poke someone's eye out!"

Rey giggled.

Finn smiled, helping Rey to her feet. "Up and at 'em, Mama Jedi. Time for you to get your beauty sleep."

Rey smiled at him tenderly. "What would I do without you?"

"Don't know," Finn winked. "But I'd bet you'd manage."

Rey beamed and pecked his cheek.

* * *

Standing up out of a squat position, Poe wiped the beads of sweat off his brow, careful to not paint his forehead with streaks of brown varnish. His magnum opus was almost ready, and in plenty of time for the blended family's impending new addition. The side door to the garage opened, and Finn poked his head in, carrying a tray.

"Thought you might like something cool to drink," he sauntered over.

Poe smiled in gratitude and accepted the beverage. "Are we sure I didn't marry _you_ that night of drunken debauchery? Zorri should be doing this."

Finn chuckled. "Just don't let her hear you say that, or you're liable to get decked!"

"Now you sound like Rey," the pilot cracked. "Speaking of which, where is she?"

"Out in the front garden. She's knitting something for the baby."

"Well, fetch her, will you? I have a surprise for her."

Finn nodded and dashed out. Poe yelled after him, "Tell her to close her eyes! And no peeking!"

A few moments later, Finn reappeared, guiding Rey by the hand. The Jedi was covered by a blindfold, which Finn quickly removed.

"And... open them."

One hand on her stomach, Rey's other hand went to her mouth as she gasped in astonishment. Tears pricked at her eyes. "Oh, my Maker! It's a vision! You shouldn't have! How did you...? How...?"

Poe blushed bashfully, rubbing the back of his neck. "My dad was a carpenter back on Yavin IV. Taught me everything he knew. And... since coming here, in my free time, I've been experimenting with the wood. Ajan Klossian lumber is plenty sturdy, doesn't bow as much. Full disclosure: I borrowed your lightsaber a few times to get some of the fancier whittling just right..."

He didn't finish his rambling. Rey reached him in a few waddles and hugged him around the neck. Her tears fell on to his flight jumpsuit.

"Thank you," she got out with shaky breath.

Poe beamed. "You're welcome, little desert flower."


	6. Chapter 6: An Emperor's Blood, A Queen's

**Chapter 6: An Emperor's Blood, A Queen's Name**

The morning that once again changed Rey's life forever began like any other. She rose early, and waddled slowly into the kitchen, holding back a yawn, to find Poe and Zorri already eating at the breakfast table. Finn was stationed by the skillet.

"Good morning," Rey trilled, attempting to gently lower herself into an empty chair. Finn reached for her, but she waved him off. "It's OK, I'm OK, Finny." Spying Poe's plate, her eyes gleamed ravenously. "Is that a bantha cheese omelette?"

Poe eyed her warily. "It's also my last one," he all but whined. Zorri elbowed him, but he ignored it.

Rey, meanwhile, furrowed her brow, before glancing down and talking to her stomach. "Uncle Poe is a very difficult man. We hate Uncle Poe."

Sighing, Poe reluctantly pushed his plate across the table. Rey immediately brightened. "We love Uncle Poe," she chirped, instantly digging in. Finn couldn't help but laugh as he sat down beside her.

"What our little desert flower wants, she gets."

"Hmm," Rey smiled, absently rubbing her belly. "Two little desert flowers, I should think." All at once, her nails dug into her skin as she clutched at her stomach, her face contorting in pain through an airy, high-pitched yelp. "OHHH!"

Something wet suddenly trickled along Finn's shoe. Glancing down, he saw water streaming down Rey's legs. Then his best friend pitched forward, almost prone across the tabletop. "AHHH!"

"REY!" Finn immediately scooped her up, bridal style.

"Finny, I'm not fragile," the Jedi huffed. "My water just broke... Oh, God! It's coming! The... The baby's coming..."

Finn snapped his gaze to Poe, eyes wild with panic. "What do we do?"

Poe's expression was grim. "Get her to Kalonia. Let's move. Zorri, overnight bag should be in Rey's closet."

The bounty hunter ran to fetch it. As soon as she was back, the quartet were sprinting out of their hut and through the jungle to the med base, Poe gripping his comlink and screaming into it, "Jedi in labor! I repeat: Jedi in labor!"

* * *

They had been sitting out in the whitewashed hallway for the better part of an hour. The only sound that could be heard was Finn tremulously bouncing his leg - a nervous tic from his days as a Stormtrooper that had never completely gone away. When the door next to them opened at last, and Dr. Kalonia stepped out, the darker-skinned man had to physically restrain himself from sprinting into her personal space.

"Rey is experiencing contractions at regular intervals, but she could be responding better to the pain medication."

Poe nodded his head. "Give her an uptick in the morphine dosage and see what happens. Make sure Ms. Skywalker has everything she needs. And you," he rounded on Finn as Kalonia retreated back inside, "stop tapping your damn foot! Rey will come through OK, just as she always has."

"I can't help it!" Finn groused. In need of a physical outlet for his pent-up energy, he resorted to pacing the floor. Poe failed utterly in trying to hide his amusement.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd say she was having your baby. Is there something you and Rey aren't telling me?" He gave his friend a saucy wink, but was only met with a stony glare. He tried again. "You need to calm down. Zorri's in there with her..."

"That doesn't make me feel any better." Finn didn't even bother to say this under his breath. Poe was sorely tempted to come to the defense of his wife, but he let the moment pass. He knew that Rey and Zorri didn't get on well, but he had figured that Rey would do better with a fellow female at her side, instead of two dithering, panicking men. Poe could not deny that he was also concerned, although he hid it well.

A sudden scream from the other side of the door made them both jump, and Finn looked like he wanted to break the door down. The pilot rested his head in his hands. "She needs Ben..."

"Ben isn't here!" Finn snapped a little too forcefully. Poe cocked an eyebrow.

"I'm aware."

The door opened once again, and Kalonia bustled out. "Delivery is imminent. If you gentlemen..."

Finn didn't need to be told twice, or even wait for the doctor to finish her directive. He charged into the operating room, with Poe hot on his heels. Rey was in the hospital bed, flat on her back, her legs in stirrups. Zorri was at her side, holding her hand.

"...because you're not trying hard enough..." the bounty hunter was saying.

Catching Poe's eye, Rey tried to smile; it actually came off as more of a grimace. "Poe," she said sweetly. "Can you please fetch my lightsaber so I can run your wife through with it?!"

Poe frowned, turning to Zorri. "Now, honey, is that really helpful?" he admonished, taking his wife aside. "You want her to deliver that baby safely? Tell her what she wants to hear."

Zorri scoffed. "You mean lie."

"I mean encouragement," Poe corrected, even as Rey let out another bloodcurdling scream. Finn looked queasy.

"What's wrong with her?" he croaked. Poe sighed. He had been inside a hospital before; he knew how birthings worked. That Finn did not was starting to get on the pilot's last nerves. The General guided his partner over to a chair.

"Have a seat before you hurt yourself."

Rey was openly sobbing through the pain now, her face contorted in agony. "Oh, Force, please help me... Ben! BEN!" She wept bitterly, before whispering over and over, as if in prayer. "Be with me... Be with me... Be with me..."

Just then, Finn raised his head from where he had it resting between his knees. "What the hell is that?"

Poe and Zorri glanced around, seeing and hearing nothing... except that Rey now had an oddly blissful expression on her face, her gaze fixated seemingly on some corner of the ceiling. She let out a happy sigh. "Ben..."

Finn straightened, orbs going wide in astonishment.

"He's here. Solo is here."

Poe gasped. "You can _hear_ him?"

"No."

"But you can see him."

"No... I... sense him. His presence. He's here, I know he is." The trooper shook his head, and almost wanted to smile. "He's done it! The son-of-a-bitch has done it! A Force Ghost..."

Poe glanced back to Rey. "One that I think Rey can see..." The loving, dreamy expression was still on the Jedi's face. It was almost like... something invisible was holding her in its arms. Poe had never believed in the Force until he met Leia, and even then, some skepticism over the power had lingered. But, maybe... just maybe...

Rey's face scrunched up in pain as another contraction hit. "Don't let me go," she pleaded with the invisible Ben. Then, all at once, her entire body started to seize.

"Rey? REY!" Finn bellowed.

* * *

Time slowed down. All sound seemed to cease. The only thing that existed was the shimmering visage of her Ben, smiling at her, holding her. All at once, Rey felt a wave of peace wash over her, just like the one she had felt as she lay dying on Exogol. It would be so, so easy, she thought, to slip the bonds of this earth and touch the face of God. Or the Force itself. Or wherever anyone went in the end. Wherever her Ben was. She had heard tell of a World Between Worlds. Paradise without end. The Jedi could die with her. And if the baby lived, Finn and Poe and Zorri would take good care of it, she knew.

And yet, something held her back. A bubbling cauldron of anticipation. Breathless delight.

_Every inch of me is trembling, and not from the cold... Something is familiar, like a dream I can reach but not quite hold. I can sense you there, like a friend I've always known... I'm arriving and it feels like I am home... I have always been a fortress, cold secrets deep inside. You have secrets too... but you don't have to hide. Show yourself... I'm dying to meet you... Are you the one I've been waiting for all of my life?... _

Ben beamed down at her. His lips moved, forming three little words:

_I love you. _

* * *

"...and PUSH!" Kalonia's voice came rushing into Rey's ears. Arching her back and with a final scream, something slid out of her. Ben's warm, transparent embrace tightened around her. From her other side, a calloused hand brushed the sweaty bangs back from her forehead, to be replaced by a pair of wet lips. The distinct scent of aftershave, followed by Poe's hoarse voice.

"Good girl... Good girl, Rey..."

Eyes coming back into focus, Rey's gaze found a little squalling thing wrapped in a white blanket. Freshly cleaned, it was being attended to by Kalonia.

Everything started spinning. Rey felt dizzy, and positively sick with love. She opened her mouth, the sound struggling to come out.

"Ami... Amidala..." she named her daughter. Her speech slurred slightly at the end, but without diminishing the clarity of her wishes. "Amidala Skywalker Solo."

Finn now came into view, tears falling on her upturned face. "Beautiful," he choked. His body turned slightly, as he accepted something from Kalonia before holding it out to Rey.

And then Amidala was in her arms. And that is when Rey lost it, furiously beginning to weep. She nuzzled her face close to her daughter's, peppering kisses along every inch of skin.

"You won't ever be alone," she vowed in a fierce whisper. "You won't _ever_ be alone... Force above, I love you so much! Oh, Ben... just look at what we made... I love you both."

And it seemed fitting that only she could hear him as Ben answered, "I know."


	7. Chapter 7: Domesticity

**Chapter 7: Domesticity**

Poe had to ram his shoulder into the wood to get the door to give way. Running his fingers along the jamb, he inspected it.

"This deadbolt's too tight! I'm fixing it tomorrow."

"I'll help you, Poe! We do need to baby-proof the house," Finn brought up the rear. Between them, Rey glided into the Dameron compound, cradling Amidala. The smile had not left her face in the 24 hours since she had given birth.

Her grin contagious, Poe led the group into Rey's room, where the baby's crib awaited. Gliding forward, Rey gingerly laid Amidala in her cradle. "There we go..."

Poe inspected the scene as closely as he had scrutinized the doorjamb. "It's missing something..." He held out a hand. "Lightsaber."

Wary and deeply confused, Rey slapped her saber hilt into Poe's palm. Standing at the head of the crib, Poe ignited it, before oh so carefully etching into the varnished timber. After a few minutes, he switched off the blade and stepped back to admire the new engraving: AMIDALA.

"_Now_ it's perfect."

* * *

She and Ben were in a shady clearing amidst a beautiful forest. The couple kissed and kissed, smiling between each one. Rey tenderly played with the nape of his neck.

"You look so beautiful," Ben breathed. Rey blushed.

"You're just being nice... I know I haven't gotten my figure back..."

Ben pulled her closer. "You look beautiful no matter what your figure is." Rey beamed and pulled him back in for another kiss.

"WAHHHHH! WAHHHH!" A piercing cry suddenly pierced their beautiful dream. Ben glanced around.

"What... Is that a fire drill?"

Rey just giggled. "It's our daughter. I have to wake up."

Ben gave her one last deep kiss. "Kiss our child for me," he murmured.

Rey pulled herself out of the dream. Back in reality, the cries refused to abate. Sliding into her slippers and donning her bathrobe, she padded out to her daughter's bedroom. The layout of the Dameron compound was such that she had to cross longways through the sitting room and kitchen to reach the nursery.

"Hi, precious..." Rey cooed, lifting Amidala out of her crib. "You hungry?" Mother and daughter stole back into the kitchen so that the baby could have her feeding, Rey struggling to undo her nightgown and bra band partway. On the sleep couch, there was a rustling and a slumbering form rolled over.

"Wha's going on...?"

"Sssh, Finny - go back to sleep," Rey whispered. Amidala let out a plaintive cry of impatience.

Finn grunted. "Little late for that." He swung his legs off of the cot and dragged himself to join Rey over at the kitchen window, where Amidala had already latched on and begun to suckle.

Rey found herself leaning her head on Finn's shoulder. "Isn't it pretty? The moon?"

"Divine," Finn quipped. The best friends drifted off into a companionable silence. At last, Finn spoke.

"Does it bother you that I'm here instead of Ben?"

Rey frowned, peering at him. "Of course it doesn't bother me. I mean... yes, I wish Ben was here to see all this. In an ideal galaxy, I would have both of you and Poe on hand to help raise my daughter. But the galaxy isn't perfect." She laced her fingers through his. "I'm just glad my galaxy is as close to perfect as it will ever get. I may not have Ben, but... at least I still have you."

Finn glanced down at their joined hands and something unreadable came over his features. The spell was only broken by Amidala, who had had her fill and was now squirming against her mother's breast, a cry threatening to escape from her.

Rey passed the baby to Finn. "Hold her?"

He nodded, minding Amidala's head awkwardly but ably as Rey shyly turned away to readjust her clothing. He even burped the baby for her. Rounding back to Finn, Rey gave him a weak smile, but Finn just put an arm over her shoulders.

"Come on."

Still holding the baby, he guided the girls back to the nursery. Emphatically, he pointed to the rocking chair in the corner. "Go to sleep, Mama Jedi."

Rey rolled her eyes, failing to hide a grin, but she did as he asked. Eyes growing heavy, she observed Finn say to her child, "And as for you, little desert flower, why don't we read a story until you fall asleep?" Plucking a picture book off of the tiny bookshelf - a gift from Zorri - Finn cracked it open with his free hand and began to read in a soothing, rumbling baritone:

"Once upon a time, there were three little BB units..."


	8. Chapter 8: Yuletide Confusion

**Chapter 8: Yuletide Confusion**

Rey hurried through the snow flurries currently inundating the jungle world, clad in a parka and with a few packages just picked up from the general store stuffed under her arm. She had managed to get some Jedi meditation in, on the assurance that Finn was at home watching Amidala, or Ami as the blended family had taken to nicknaming her. Now, she could get home and enjoy the holiday with her family.

Knocking on the door of the Dameron compound, Poe answered it and pulled her into a hug.

"Rey! Happy Yuletide!" The house was crowded, with most of the former Resistance gathered here. Still no Rose, Lando, or Jannah, but they had sent a comm from the _Falcon_, assuring them that all was well.

Rey shrugged off her coat and set the packages down on the table. "I got gifts for everyone..." Spying Finn emerging from the hall, she stepped into his arms, halting him at the archway.

"She's napping," he reported, hugging her back.

"Uh-oh!" Zorri called, sounding a little tipsy. "Look who's under the mistletoe!"

Finn and Rey glanced up to spy the little sprig hanging in the archway. Rey had barely returned her gaze to her friend before he was leaning forward and kissing her. She jerked back, startled.

"What... what are you doing?"

"Well, it's tradition, isn't it?" And before Rey could say anything further, his gloved hands were cupping her cheeks and he was kissing her again. Rey whimpered a little into his mouth, deeply confused, but felt that she had little choice but to hold the kiss, at least for a moment, while trying to ignore all the wolf whistles and whoops. Finally, Rey and Finn broke apart and she staggered out of the archway.

"So: who wants some brandy?" Poe called loudly.

* * *

It was later that night when Rey, in her bathrobe and slippers, took a deep breath before padding out into the sitting room. Finn was sitting up on his cot by the light of a reading lamp, leafing aimlessly through a policy packet that he must have brought home from work. His eyes shifted up at her presence and he set the tome aside.

"Ami asleep?"

Rey nodded, pursing her lips tightly. She sat down gingerly on the edge of the bed, taking his hand softly. "I need to talk to you," she murmured. She heard Finn sigh, evidently fearing the worst and yet knowing what was coming.

"Wait." She glanced up, freezing a little as she felt his strong palm cup her cheek rather intimately. The liquid pools that were his eyes seemed to be boring a path right into her very soul. "I'm going to kiss you again, Rey."

She gulped, her voice coming out in a whisper. "If you do, I'll have to tell Ben once I fall asleep tonight."

Finn only chuckled. "If the worst coming to me is eternal torment at the hands of a Force Ghost, I think I'll take the risk." He waited for a moment, and when she didn't move, he closed in and pressed his lips to hers.

This time, Rey held it - really held it - and even put in an effort to kiss him back, a little. Her fingers found their way into his hair, and she had to appreciate how he had grown it out in the two or so years since Crait. Mouths fell open and when Rey felt Finn's tongue touch hers, she shivered violently, pulling out of the kiss rather abruptly.

For no matter how much it would seem natural, at least on the surface, no matter how much she kissed Finn back, it...

"Anything?" His voice cut through her thoughts.

Rey could only smile at him sheepishly, apologetically. "I'm sorry," she whimpered.

Finn sighed and nodded his head, defeated. Rey gave his hand a squeeze. "If things were different, if I had never fallen for Ben, maybe someday we could have..."

"But things _aren't_ different," Finn reminded her. "And you wouldn't have Ami." He huffed out another breath. "I'll never stop loving you, but I'll have to love you in a different way."

Rey felt moved to hug him. "I wish I felt the same," she whispered into his hair. "But it's just... when I kiss you... it's like I'm kissing... my brother." She felt Finn guffaw against her and she laughed too. "I could have said that better..."

"No, I understand. Just... promise me I won't lose you as my best friend."

Drawing back, Rey smiled and shook her head. "You won't." A pause and then: "I love you, Finny." And from the sad grin he sent her way, she knew he understood the meaning behind it.

"I know."

* * *

They were on a beautiful walk together, just her and Finn and Amidala, a few days after Yuletide. Poe had gifted his niece with a toy landspeeder, which never hovered more than an inch off the ground. Rey had been concerned at first, but with her tinkering skills, had managed to modify the toy's speed capabilities, turning it into a kind of stroller - one that bobbed just at her feet as she and Finn strolled arm in arm and platonically chatted.

Rey had been utterly relieved that she and Finn had come to an understanding, and felt confident that someday, if the kisses they shared ever came up, they would look back on them and laugh.

"She's getting so big already," Finn marveled. "Is she really only three months old?"

Rey laughed. "Well, Ben was a rather large man, and with all those genes jumping around..."

They opened the large gate to the Dameron compound, only to hear a loud crash and raised shouting emanating from the house. Finn's brow furrowed.

"What the hell...?"

The best friends and baby rushed into the kitchen to find Zorri hurling dishes in Poe's direction, her eyes wild and feral as her husband did his best to dodge the projectiles.

"YOU DID THIS TO ME, POE DAMERON! I WILL NEVER LET YOU TOUCH ME AGAIN!"

"Whoa, whoa, whoa - what's going on?" Finn yelped, as Rey plucked Amidala from her landspeeder stroller and cuddled her close, the cacophony already causing the infant to whimper.

Zorri merely pointed a shaking finger at Poe. "ASK. HIM!"

A strained silence as Finn looked his buddy up and down. "All right, you idiot, what did you do?"

Poe's eyes nearly popped. "I didn't do anything!"

"YES YOU DID! YOU KNOCKED ME UP WITH YOUR DEMON SEED!"

Rey gasped. "Zorri... you're pregnant?"

"Not for long," the bounty hunter huffed, stalking for the door. "I'm going to Kalonia for an abortion right now..."

Poe's jaw dropped. "You can't do that!"

"Actually, she can, Poe - it's her body. But," and Rey danced around the stroller to get in Zorri's path. "Let's not make any rash decisions."

"Rash decisions?" Zorri gawped. "Whose side are you on?"

"I'm not on _anyone's_ side!" Rey pleaded. "I just think... you and Poe are married... you need to talk about this calmly and rationally and make a decision together." She noted, but didn't comment on, how Poe was staring at Zorri's stomach with almost childlike wonder.

Zorri huffed audibly. Even when angry, she was stunningly beautiful; Rey felt suddenly inadequate, like she could never be as beautiful as her. Poe chose this relatively calm moment to take Zorri's hand.

"Let's go for a walk." After eyeing him for a moment warily, she nodded.

Once the pair left, Rey put Amidala down for her nap, before returning to the kitchen and helping Finn make a pot of tea. The late afternoon sun danced across the sky, sinking below the jungle canopy, and by the time Poe and Zorri returned it was well after dark. Conspicuously hand-in-hand, the Damerons sat down next to their friends and boarders.

"I'm keeping it," Zorri announced in as strong a voice as she could muster. Finn cocked an eyebrow, clearly surprised, as the bounty hunter turned to Rey. "Ami deserves a little cousin to play with. And, having a mother on hand... maybe you could help me?" Rey nodded eagerly.

"Also," Zorri continued. "We're getting married. Again." Her grip tightened around Poe's hand. "Only this time we want to do it the _right_ way."

* * *

It was a lovely wedding. Finn was Best Man and Rey was Maid of Honor, carrying Ami down the aisle. The baby was a hit as the Flower Girl. At the reception, Rey took Zorri aside. The bride was stunning and still not yet ready to show, so no one suspected a thing.

"Zorri, I know you and I haven't always gotten along. But I want to put our differences aside and hope we can be friends. Please, accept me as a sister."

In answer, Zorri kissed Rey's cheek and actually smiled.

* * *

It came as quite a shock to everyone in the Dameron household when Rey announced, not long after Ami's first birthday, that mother and daughter would be moving off-world. Little Kitt Dameron was only weeks old, and already a favorite fascination for Rey's daughter.

"And where exactly will you be going?" Finn demanded. "It better not be a desert planet. I mean it, Rey - I will check the data files!"

Rey laughed. "Naboo is the farthest thing from desert, Finn. It's lush and green and... Ben's grandmother once ruled there. I feel like living on Naboo... Ami and I will be closer to him. And we'll come back and visit."

"You better," Zorri smirked. "I still need my best adviser on parenting." She said this even as she burped Kitt expertly.


	9. Chapter 9: Twelve Years Later

**Chapter 9: Twelve Years Later**

The freighter powered down on the lush, green, jungle moss as Rey did final landing checks. Glancing back into the living quarters, she was relieved to find her almost teenage daughter still fast asleep on the plush booth in the living quarters. Scooping Amidala into her arms, Rey strode down the gangplank, where she was met by a grinning Finn.

"Hey," he whispered. "I got her... Oof!" He swayed a bit under his niece's weight, chuckling. "She's mighty big to be rocked."

Rey smiled warmly. "Everyone else inside?"

"Yup." Finn guided the pair into the Dameron compound, where hushed greetings were made by Poe and Zorri.

"Put her on the sleep couch," Poe suggested.

"Hi, Auntie Rey!" a young boy of eleven barreled into the Jedi for a hug.

"Kitt Dameron, not so loud!" Zorri scolded. "Your cousin is asleep!"

The rest of the group moved into the kitchen, where Poe and Zorri began fixing up a late dinner. Rey, Finn and Kitt sat at the table and chatted. Their banter was interrupted by some persistent giggling.

"Poe! Stop!" Zorri laughed, but accepted a kiss as she and her husband embraced. Kit glanced to the scene for only a moment before turning back to Rey, a question in his eyes.

"Auntie Rey? Do you have someone to kiss you the way Daddy kisses Mommy?"

Rey smiled sadly. "I did, sweetheart... once. But he passed away. He's still with me though... in here."

"Ami's dad?" Rey nodded. The boy glanced back to his surrogate cousin, still passed out on the sleep couch. Rey thought she recognized the look in his eyes... and only hoped that if anything came of it, it wouldn't be for another several years.

* * *

Ami's scream woke the whole house in the middle of the night.

The tension didn't abate when her uncles and aunt burst into the sitting area, blasters drawn. Kitt seemed to appear by her side as if by magic, putting a tentative arm around her. Rey embraced her daughter from the other side, allowing Amidala to weep bitterly into her nightgown.

"I saw you dying, Mommy! There was this evil, old man torturing you. And then... and then Daddy, he..." She dissolved into sniffles.

Rey just cradled her. "Ssssssh... That's all over now... The nightmare's over... I miss Daddy too, but he gave his life so that Mommy and you can be free and safe."

Finn nodded. "Ami, your dad made some... complex decisions, and they weren't always the right ones. But in the end, he was a good man. When it really counted, he did what was right."

"Exactly," Poe nodded. "Your parents both have light and dark inside of them. And you do, too. What matters is the part you choose to act on. You can be like your dad was in his final moments. And just know that wherever he is, he is proud of you and loves you very much."

Rey looked around at her makeshift family gratefully. It had not always been quick and easy for them to accept Ben, but they had accepted their daughter. Knowing that Amidala had people who loved her was just as good, if not better, than her happiest dreams spent with Ben.


End file.
